Marathons Mess With Your Partner’s Head Too

Last night Ben worked late and picked up Thai food on the way home. Fine by me Smileimage


I woke up bright and early to run with my new adopted running group this morning. The other day I was taking a walk on a nearby path and two ladies were writing mile markers on the ground with chalk. I inquired about it and next thing you know I was invited to train with them for the Los Angeles Marathon!

They are in week 1 of training = doing 8 miles. That’s perfect for me because I’m still recovering from the Santa Barbara Marathon last weekend. I did 8 miles and my knees felt tired and glad I didn’t do more! As of right now I am just running with them for company, not running LA. 

Ready, ready to run

Set, set


I got back from my run a little over an hour later and surprised Ben. I know training for a half or full marathon really skews your idea of what a normal amount of exercise is, but apparently it messes with the people around you too:

Ben: “You’re back fast! It’s Saturday, why didn’t you run more?!”

Me: “I did 8 miles.”

Ben: “But I thought today was your long run day?!”

Me: “8 miles is long to normal people. Plus I RAN A FREAKING MARATHON LAST WEEKEND HELLO.”

Then, we ate pancakes. The end. post run pancakes

Question: Do you think training for a race OR reading running / fitness blogs skews what  you think of as a normal amount of exercise or running?


  1. says

    I think being someone who runs regularly skews your perception lol. Before I started running in May I didn’t exercise a lot. Now I’m mad at myself because I didn’t beat my PR at my 5k this morning. This time last year I was just sitting on my butt!!!!

  2. says

    For me, 10 miles is still long, but I’m only training for a half. 10 seems to be my wall for now. BUT…compared to the rest of my friends who either don’t run at all or at most do 5Ks, 10 miles is ridiculous and I must be a freak. So, yes, I’d say that training for a race AND reading blogs skews your view, but not necessarily in a bad way. :)

  3. Emily says

    Yes! Just like being a couch potato skews your mind as to a normal amount of fitness. Parking far away from the store and walking in does not constitute a healthy amount of exercise. And reading fitness blogs makes me think I’m the laziest sloth around. I wish I looked like a sloth. They are the cutest things ever.

  4. says

    I would definitely say so. Because I was ‘going’ to run 7.5-8 yesterday but cut the run a little short simply because I didn’t want to run on this one particular road and I wanted to save time to take pretty fall pictures before heading home to get ready for work. Anyway, I felt guilty, but then my coworkers start teasing me, “Oh, she’s SUCH a slacker. She ONLY ran ‘6 or 7’ miles today. Better stick to a salad for dinner!” Usually snaps me back into reality 😉

  5. says

    It sure does skew ones mind. I was out running one morning and some girls asked if I was going long. I said, “No, just 8 miles!” They said, “Oh wow, that’s far for us!” 8 miles is a long ways but when you are logging 20 milers it seems like a short jaunt down the road. My kids even have skewed little minds. One day I had done a half marathon and said that I was really tired and my daughter said, “It was ONLY a half marathon!!!” Kids :)

  6. says

    Agreed. I also think once they see you do a long race they think you can do it anytime. Case in point, I did a 1/2 on 11/4. A week before that my husband says “wanna run a half when we’re on vaca?” 2 weeks after the race I trained for? “Ya. You can do it,”. and here I am…. About to pick up my bib number…. 😉

  7. Erin says

    Yes, I really do think training for a long race skews you view of “normal” exercise. I just trained for 2 half marathons and now have to back off due to knee injury and awaiting an MRI. I feel horrible when I can only put in a 3 or 4 mile run, so I mix that w/ walking, yoga, or weight lifting. I feel like I need to devote 2 hours to fitness or I’m not in shape! I rode my spin bike for over an hour today + did level 1 Jillian Michael’s 30 day shred. I still do not feel that same feeling I get when I finish a long run.

  8. Melissa R. says

    Oh yeah it’s skewed. I did the Savannah marathon (11/3) and then a week later (11/10) did the Richmond marathon 11/10 (PR’d too!). So mentally I think I should be doing another one this weekend, haha. Feels like I’m slacking taking it easy this week but to the general non-runner, I’m an overachiever. It just doesn’t feel that way to ME, that’s all. Luckily I surround myself with marathoners (maniacs, even) so I’m totally normal.

  9. Breanna says

    That convo with Ben is too funny! I think it is so true that training/running blogs change not only your perception, but those around you. I had a similar moment yesterday with my mom.

    Mom: So how was your run? How far did you go?
    Me: It was good! I did 7 miles.
    Mom: Oh that’s it?
    Me: More than you’ve ever run!

    Lol! Even when I tell some of my friends about my training they think I am an insane running addict, when I run about 10-20 miles a week. To some that may be a lot, and to others that may be nothing! It’s all about the perception!

  10. says

    It totally skews your idea of normal exercise! I got so used to 13 or 14 mile weekend runs that doing 8 felt like I hadn’t done enough! Now that I’ve been doing a little less lately since I’m starting to train for LA, the 8 I ran this morning felt like a pretty decent amount. Weird!

  11. Bertram says

    Definitely. I did 8 miles this mornings and my time wasn’t nearly that good but my wife is like “8 miles is far” I’m like not really…I’m used to it. I start marathon training in the new yr and I’ve ran halfs before but my spouse is still amazed that anyone would volunteer to run 8 miles

  12. Natalie from UK says

    Yes definitely. I go into work after a short run of 4 or 5 miles. That is a huge run for most normal people and i feel like a show off when im disappointed and say oh i only managed to fit in a short run this morning. I consider a long one 10 miles. Haven’t run for two weeks as have had a flu type virus. Ran 7m this morning and it felt amazing. A long term niggling Achilles pain had disappeared too so it was a bonus.

  13. Amanda says

    I just have to say that when your perspective gets out of whack, it can definitely rub off on the people around you. I used to never take rest days, and I finally started about a year ago. Both my boyfriend and my family would sometimes be like “WHAT?! you’re not exercising today?” Um … no, I’m not. Normal people take rest days and it’s okay to not be super obsessive, always does super long runs, never takes a day off, always in workout clothes, super woman. Because I’d rather be strong, not totally broken down and burned out all the time.
    And yes, 8 miles is still a long run. Good for you Monica.

  14. Jennifer Shaw says

    Totally! I always thought I could never be that person that ran. 6 months ago I couldn’t run 2 minutes, so miles felt out of the question. Now, I’ve run two 5k races, training for a 10k with my ultimate goal being a half! Today I ran 4 miles for the first time EVER! I feel great, but I know I want to do way more! And yes, running blogs will skew your perspective even more, but for me it’s motivation.

  15. says

    Absolutely; for most people doing 30-45 of cardio 4 or 5 times is great. Most bloggers to much more than that and it can be really intimidating, especially when you are struggling with your own goals in terms of where you want to be fitness-wise. In fact, I’ve quit reading some for that reason (obviously not yours). I think the focus needs to be more on being active and being happy.

  16. Becky Przy says

    Yep sure does! I am/was an avid runner/worker outer, but had to take some time off from running/intense exercise. I was so lost my first Saturday morning when I didn’t have a long run on the agenda. The day lasted f.o.r.e.v.e.r. I am slowing adjusting and can’t wait to get back out there.

    That’s too funny about Ben. My husband does one of 2 things…’why are you back so early?’ (when training for a HM vs full) or he will call be 1 1/2 hours into a 18 mile run and ask me whats taking so long;-)

  17. Jenny B says

    I’ve been running for quite a while now (usually on the treadmill) and I can’t seem to make it past 5-6 miles! Ugggh so frustrating ! I wish I could go longer distances, although I’m not training for anything in particular. Do you think that it is just because running doesn’t seem to come naturally for me? By the way, I’ve noticed in your latest posts that you look much more slender! Of course not saying that you were big before! I just wanted to let you know because, from experience, it seems that when people notice and speak up it helps with my motivation :) Love your blog!!!

  18. says

    I definitely agree that it skews my view of what is normal. The more miles I log, the more it feels like what used to be a long run is now just a normal or easy workout and not that challenging. Now I consider 10 miles to be a take it easy run, where as 10 miles used to scare the crap out of me.

  19. Teresa says

    Sometimes I feel like a slacker after reading fitness blogs. I’ve been trying for five years to train for a half marathon, but injury always sets me back. Plus, it’s hard to find time to run when I work full time and commute. Training for a race is great motivation, but I think it’s important to stress moderation in diet and exercise.

  20. says

    My boyfriend went hiking today; I did a long run. I anticipated doing 15 miles (or 17 as it turned out…) I expected to be done in 2.5 hours and asked who would finish first? I haven’t heard from him yet, but I think most of his “hike” consisted of taking pictures of the mountains :)

  21. Grecia says

    I think reading blogs might skew my perspective. I see people doing double digit miles on a regular basis and I am barely working my way there (I’m at 9!) or being super speedy like you and I think “I’m such a slowpoke!” Still love reading blogsthough.

  22. says

    I don’t think it necessarily skews what a normal amount is. But it depends on what you are training for. I started to resent that “I HAVE to run so many miles” on the weekends. So I have backed off of the “training” and am just running.

    The Kidless Kronicles

  23. Rochelle says

    it most definitely does. Im training for my 1st marathon and the 20 miler was killer, followed by an ‘easy’ 16 the next week, it was amazing how i felt like 16 was no big deal at all. My training buddies and i laugh about our perception of mileage now, other people think we are insane…I love it!

  24. Rachel says

    My vision on “a normal amount of running” is totally skewed. For instance, I’ll say to a friend that “I took it easy yesterday. I only ran 7 miles.” Then I think about that statement and realize to most people that wouldn’t be “easy”. It’s weird that when I first started running (in high school) I thought people who ran 5 miles were insane and I thought it was impossible to actually run 5 miles without stopping. I thought they had to walk somewhere in there! Now–unless I run over 2 hours it’s not a “long run”. I also realize how weird my “normal” run is when I think about how much stuff people can do while I’m running….but love it!

  25. says

    For sure! People seem surprised by how far I run on a regular basis, but as they get used to my distances, they act like an 8-mile run is nothing. Nay, people. It’s not the longest, but it still takes a bit of effort…

  26. says

    I know someone who does marathon/halves around you. She is actually the reason I did my first half. Let me know if you want her info, she might be the person you met 😉

  27. megan says

    Yes reading marathon blogs skews my perception! Im not training for anything right now so mostly do 3-5 milers and sometimes get down on myself for not doing more!

  28. says

    nothing like just randomly happening upon ur next marathon! :) have fun and glad u met some fun new runner buddies.

    for sure, being a runner and being around runners so much totally warps my idea of a workout and wat a ‘rest’ day entails. it makes me feel almost bad when i snicker and laugh at wat other people do at the gym and call it a day. runner elitism at its finest i suppose. 😛

  29. says

    I completely agree with you! When you are training, you definitely have in your mindset that you have to do so much more to make sure that you are benefiting in all directions! I feel like if I miss a day during training that it will alter the entire training program (even though I know it won’t really lol)

  30. Micheline says

    Yes!!! Before reading your blog I would only run 3 miles 3 times a week but now I run four times a week with miles of 5, 6, 5, and 12 so… Gotta love the running blogs(:

  31. says

    Yes….definitely! Most of my friends and I are fitness instructors (BodyPump, TurboKick, etc.) and many of us workout most every day of the week. It really messes with your (read: MY!) head when I have only worked out 5-6 hours a week. That’s what most Americans should be shooting for for optimum health and fitness, isn’t it? It’s hard not to beat myself up for only doing that much (I typically try and do about 10-12 hours a week, between marathon training, teaching classes, and my own fitness). It’s hard to remember that training or teaching can really skew your idea of “normal”.

  32. Steve says

    Yes, and it depends on what you’ve been doing. As a 4,000+ mile/yr cyclist, my perception of what is a long, challenging, or easy bike ride is definitely skewed. As a beginning runner, I am at the other extreme (a 10k, 10 miler, let alone longer distances are “Mt Everest” for me at this point). What is weird, is because I am accustomed to long endurance activities, is having the patience for the parts of me not accustomed to running to catch up!

  33. Sandra says

    OK, so this is totally unrelated to the post but I had to share anyway. Remember how you don’t like the TJ’s pumpkin yogurt?… well, I felt the exact same way but unfortunately I stocked up on the crap on the recommendation of one of their employees. Sooo… I decided to try and salvage it. Insert evil laughter *nutbuttertotherescue!* – Seriously, it’s ridiculous how yummy it is with the addition of some almond butter. If you have any left I urge you to try this combo for the win 😉

  34. says

    I agree that if you are a consistent runner or read fitness blogs that it skews what you think is a normal amount of exercise. When you read blogs about people who work out 2 times a day and run on top of that you definitely think you don’t do enough!

    Also, I am going to start training soon for a mini-marathon! The race is the beginning of May – how far ahead should I start training? And what would be considered a “long” run when training for a mini? It is going to be my first race over 4 miles!

  35. says

    It totally does… I’ve just started my 1/2 marathon training, first time I’ve every followed a plan. And while on vacation my boyfriend came with me to the gym. I was having a really rough time with the 3 miles and had to for 20-30 seconds a couple of times. After on our way back to the room he asked how much I ran and I said 3 miles and he goes “well you walked, aren’t you supposed to be running.” I was like OMG!

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