Welcome to Run Eat Repeat. I am Monica and I am using running and healthy eating to lose weight and stop dieting! Subscribe to my RSS feed or Email Me for healthy tips.
Pictures
This is my weight journey story. If we’re just meeting you should see my About page too.
Growing up I was always on the chubby side. A red-headed firecracker, but a little chubby…
I wasn’t “fat”, but I was bigger than my friends.
Let’s keep in mind I am Mexican and grew up in a Mexican neighborhood. This means all my best friends were short, petite and looked very different from me.
This is me and my BFF when we were in third grade. She is six months older than me and I am 40 pounds heavier than her. I was well aware of our size difference. 
I remember one of the boys calling me FAT in third grade. I knew it was true and it hurt so bad. I kind of decided that day that I was fat and ate accordingly. I thought I was fat, so I made myself fat.
Ballet Folklorico and cheerleading kept me from being too overweight, but I was still a little heavier than I should have been. 
And being a cheerleader kept me very aware of my body compared to my friends’. 
Then, it got worse when I began to use food to make me feel better. I would eat when I was lonely, sad or tired. I gained weight and was very unhappy. 
At my heaviest I was probably over 170 
After high school I began to diet. I tried everything – Weight Watchers, Atkins, South Beach, Jenny Craig, Cabbage Soup…
I lost weight and got to around 150- BUT I became obsessive and wanted to lose more weight. Thus began a binge/restrict cycle that developed into disordered eating patterns. Since I was still eating during my binges, but exercising to cancel them out, I always stayed around 150-155. 
This resulted in my brain and my body getting very messed up. I gained back any weight I lost from dieting and now have emotional baggage from it too. I am currently trying to lose weight and get to my happy place, but I don’t know when I am hungry or full or just emotional. Now I am working on becoming an Intuitive Eater, but everyday is a struggle.
I am currently around 160 (at 5″6) and looking to lose 15 pounds for a “happy weight” of 145. I run four or five days a week and eat a fairly healthy diet. But now I must learn how to eat intuitively and express my emotions with words or running – NOT food. Thanks for following along in my little journey 
This is me on my wedding day in June. I refused to go on a diet before the big day because I am truly committed to Intuitive Eating and I knew a wedding dress crash diet would mean an equal and opposite binge.
Today I am all about running, eating healthy food and learning to listen to my body. Stay tuned!
Thanks for visiting Run Eat Repeat!
For more – check out my About page
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
love this new page! you look absolutely stunning in your wedding picture. (and all the other ones, of course
)
I love the pic’s. I was chubby as a kid too, you’re really not alone in this. All those remarks people make about your size sting and leave scars. It’s taken me years to just appreciate myself. I’m sure I’m not the only reader who knows where you are coming from. : )
I think you are beautiful in all of your pictures!
Your wedding photo is beautiful!
You look amazing! I love your dress so so much!
I remember other kids calling me fat when I was small too – it REALLY hurts, doesn’t it? It’s one of my most vivid childhood memories!
You look like a knockout in your wedding dress, btw
I can really relate to what you said about how looking back at photos and weight fluctations is emotional– it REALLY is. I’ve gone up and down about 50 pounds throughout my life and it’s really hard to think about all the emotions that have gone with all that.
You are beautiful! I love your little girl pic and your wedding pic!
I’m with you on the emotions that go with weight. I was chubby as a kid and was put on a diet by my doctor. That really hurt me and I think it contributed to my disordered eating in college. I think it’s so good to see patterns in your life so you have the awareness to break them and be your best self every day. You are an inspiration!
You are a beautiful bride!
beautiful wedding dress
Love the pictures and stories. You’re doing great on your journey & I think you’re making progress in intuitive eating just from reading your blog~
You look beautiful now, and especially in your wedding pictures!
You’re very pretty let me say. I was overweight growing up as well, and tried numerous diets. I remember it being really difficult because i didn’t know how to eat properly. The only thing i knew that would make me lose weight was to restrict. And that’s not a very healthy perspective.
I’m trying to eat intuitively as well. It’s hard, but rewarding when you finally start listening to your body.
All the pictures look great, but you are really stunning in your wedding gown!
Thanks for sharing your story — your wedding picture is absolutely gorgeous. I really identify with being the biggest among friends and always feeling awkward about it (same height as you, too). Thanks for taking us on your journey.
I read you blog daily but apparently haven’t ever read this page. I love it! Pictures are always so much better when you’ve gotten to “know” someone.
I love your story! I am still learning how to eat intuitively, and it is getting easier! Glad you stopped by my blog which led me to yours.
Just stumbled on your blog, I love it. I feel the exact same way as you. I would like to lose 15 lbs to get down to a “happy weight” but I can never figure out if I am hungry, emotional, or just bored.. It is hard.
I have also started running the past couple of months, so I am hungrier than usual. Hopefully I can learn a thing or two from you
since i voted for you in the fitness magazine blog awards I had to read your backstory (i can’t believe it’s taken me this long!)! you’re so beautiful and i love all of these photos…
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Love this!