About a year ago I started on my Intuitive Eating journey. After years and years of crash dieting, restricting, binging, frustration and self hatred I was desperate to find a real, lasting solution to my weight issues.
I heard about the book “Intuitive Eating” from research and blogs. I had actually already read several of Geneen Roth’s books, which encourage intuitive eating too.
But – while I felt that intuitive eating was a healthy way to maintain weight, I didn’t think it would help me lose weight. I was skeptical. I mean, I have serious issues with food. I can’t just ‘hope them away’.
I thought, “It’s not going to work for me.”
And it didn’t.
But, now looking back I realize that it didn’t work because it takes work! Figuring out your body and your mind and your emotions (when your eating issues are intertwined) is very HARD.
I established a long time ago that I don’t know when I’m hungry. I tried to figure that out, but it was difficult. A few times I didn’t realize I was hungry, let myself get overly hungry and then would binge.
I decided it didn’t work, but I still really (really, really!) wanted to lose weight so I thought about diets. I thought about weight watchers. I thought about South Beach. And then I thought about my last meal before my diet. And then I binged.
I cannot do a “diet” diet any more. I used up all my willpower during college when I would run 6 miles in the morning and eat a Slim Fast bar for breakfast. Every last drop of willpower went into those times.
So now what?
I still want to lose weight. And not just for vanity reasons (even though that is a big motivator). I want to be healthier and faster and fitter. I want to run a sub-4 hour marathon! I want to kick ass so bad.
But how do I lose weight if I can’t/won’t/shan’t diet?
Enter Evelyn Tribole!
I’ve read the book. I’ve following blogs of Intuitive Eaters, but now I need to identify the main issues that are keeping me from getting to a healthier weight for my average height.
I will be seeing her for sessions in an effort to finally conquer this beast. I’m excited! I’m revved up! And I’m finally ready to work for it without starving or dieting. Intuitive Eating is hard when you have a history like mine, but I want this to work very bad. I’m going to do it.
A year ago when I came to her I made a little progress. At least I acknowledged there was a problem (which is the first step). But, now I realize I need to work harder at it. And so the journey begins…
Added bonus: Did you know she is a runner? Evelyn “gets” the need to run and fuel properly! If she can’t help me, I don’t know who can 🙂
Back to normal RER foodies…
This morning started out great actually! I ran 6 miles with 4 of them at a little faster tempo and then made a Waffle Wednesday breakfast.
With some fruit and cottage cheese on the side 🙂
I think I ended up with a pretty decent lunch considering I packed it in 3 minutes. Tuna salad, pop chips and cherries.
I made the tuna with hummustard and relish and dumped it on top of hearts of romaine and tomatoes. Easy peasy.
Around 3pm I had this bar. I got it because of the name – Marshmallow Mudslide Bar. It didn’t change my life. But it did keep me full for 3 hours.
After my snack I had my appointment with Evelyn Tribole.
(the above was written earlier today)
But right after that I went to the family greeting / viewing for my friend who passed away. I have a lot to talk about regarding the appointment, but I can’t do it tonight. I’m sad and will see you tomorrow 🙁
P.S. – Check out my guest post at Meals and Moves!
Michelle says
I feel like I am in the same place you are with asking “now what?” So I am really interested to hear about the RD and what you learn from her. I wish you the best of luck and I’m sorry about your friend 🙁
Katie @ Health for the Whole Self says
I’m so sorry for your loss. 🙁
Looking forward to hearing more about your sessions with Evelyn Tribole!
Kelli says
Luker de-lurking
I’m sorry about your loss.
I’m very intrigued about your appt. I could of wrote your post I binge way too often and no onee knows not even my husband b/c I’m just average weight and hide it so I am cuirous to hear what she talked about I hope it works for you!
Amber K says
Intuitive eating is definitely something I struggle with. I am going to have to check out that book.
I am so sorry for your loss and I will pray for rest and comfort.
Nichole says
Fantastic thoughts on intuitive eating, thank you for sharing.
I’m so sorry to hear about your friend. Hope you are taking it easy. Loads of well wishes to you.
Sara says
I admire your honesty, Monica. Sometimes I read your blog and I feel like I’m reading my own thoughts and experiences with food. I haven’t read the book or tried intuitive eating. I still struggle with having a good day that I’m proud of and then effing it all up by binging for no reason at night. I’m interested in reading about your appointment, and I’m glad you’re so optimistic about the future!
Lindsay says
I am so sorry for your loss, Monica. But I am very excited to hear about your appointment. I see alot of myself in you….struggling with the same food issues and thoughts. I hope that hearing what you learn will not only help you live a happier, healthier life, but that you will pass on the love to me too so I can do the same! Stay strong!
Maren says
I am so sorry for your loss of your friend 🙁 I hope you are having a better day today! I hope your meeting went well yesterday and I wish you the best of luck at round 2! I love reading your blog and was so excited to see you guest posted on Janetha’s blog too! I am looking forward to hearing what you learned at your meeting yesterday!
Christina says
How exciting to get to work through Intuitive Eating with Evelyn!!! I’m about 1/2 way through the book, and loving it.
I also have my doubts that I can lose through Intuitive Eating. I can’t wait to hear more about your journey.
LOVE your blog!!!
MelissaNibbles says
Wow, what an emotional day. A big hug to you Monica!
It sounds like you’re taking the right steps towards dealing with your emotions and internal issues. It has nothing to do with food. Good luck!
Shannon says
That’s so exciting that you get to work with the actual person whp wrote the book. So many of us relate to your struggles. That, and your sense of humor, make you so popular in the blog world 🙂 Your honesty and openess makes you very relateable.
I’m so sorry for your loss 🙁
Alyssa says
It sounds like you are really motivated and I am sure you can reach your goal of a sub four marathon! I’m sorry to hear about your friend though :(.
I am really curious about intuitive eating. Could you share any of the blogs you follow of intuitive eaters? If so, thanks!
amanda says
check out http://confessionsofacompulsiveeater.com/ She is a reformed compulsive eater and just started to really do intuitive eating.
amanda says
I am working on this very same thing!!!! Evelyn’s book was actually suggested to me by a blogger friend. I am currently reading Geneen ROth’s book “Breaking free from compulsive eatin”. Maybe I should switch over to reading Evelyn’s book because just eating whatever without a guide is scary. I know I will go hog wild because I don’t know when I am really hungry until it is too late.
I am a runner too!!
Anyway, I hope your appt goes well!
Exercise and Eat says
Sounds like a tough day… glad to see you’re working through your struggles and not letting them take over!
Poppy says
I love your blog i have been reading it for a while. i run too and have also tried intuitive eating (sometimes when i read your blog i think you are my twin but i already have a twin sister 🙂 – i found it so hard to do the eating when hungry thing too and ended up being sucked back into the dieting because i gained a few pounds.
i am going to give it another try because i think dieting drives you a little crazy.
good luck with it and keep making me laugh with your blog
ida says
Sounds like a very emotional day. So great that you’ll be working with Evelyn though. I can’t wait to hear how that goes.