Today I was thinking about why I always eat snacks after dinner. It is a habit I’ve be writing about since I started the blog, yet I’ve made no progress on! So why am I still doing it? I think there are 2 reasons:
1. The RD said that some of the time it’s because I don’t eat enough during the day. This is true sometimes, but not everyday.
2. I save the best for last.
By saving the best for last I mean – Sometimes I don’t eat what I really want during the day and all my inhibitions go out the window by the end of the day. Like I will want a cookie or something after lunch, but I won’t have it because it’s not good for me. After a whole day of eating certain things I’ve allowed myself during the day I want a “treat” for my good work. Why can’t I have a cookie or frozen yogurt in the afternoon? I only allow myself to eat these treats at “treat time” after dinner. So tomorrow I am going to eat a treat when I want it and stop letting all hell break loose after dinner.
Okay, that was my rant to myself. Done.
I packed an okay lunch today, which kinda sucked because I was super hungry by 11am! Since I am waking up earlier I am hungry earlier (I run and eat breakfast earlier too). I don’t know how I am going to switch this around because I don’t really want to be eating lunch at 11am… AB&J and fruit and carrots (no pic).
My afternoon snack was yogurt and a Fiber One bar. Perfect to fuel me for a my walk home! The walk home takes me an hour which I don’t mind, but I need to remember that if I want to accomplish things after work.
When I got home I had some cherries and maybe a few chips.
Dinner was a big salad topped with chickpeas that I soaked over night…Before
After – They get so big 🙂
Ensalada with hummus for dressing. I get the hummus from Costco and good thing it’s big container or I would slap Ben’s hand away from it. I love it.
Dessert! Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. I would have had ice cream, but we don’t have any. x4ish
Trigger – Even though I originally started this blog as a tool to help me lose weight, I try not to talk about weight too much. I think talking about my weight would help others realize that these struggles are normal and you can still eat (a lot!) and lose weight. I am still working toward my goals, but I don’t want to talk about my frustrations too much because I don’t want to trigger those with ED issues. You guys know I am real as all shit here, so I’m sorry if anything I say triggers your ED tendencies.
I’m writing about this because one or two of the blogs I read trigger me sometimes and I am struggling with whether or not I should continue to read them. When someone feels super guilty or apologetic about eating a piece of dessert or something fried it makes me feel like I should feel guilty too. F-that.
Question: Do any of the blogs you read make you feel like you should Eat Less? Eat More? Be perfect? Feel guilty if you so much as touch something fried (the other F-word)?
Sometimes I do get frustrated with some of the “healthy living” bloggers because it just doesn’t seem real. I like to read about the bloggers who have to face similar issues as me– working in an office where there are treats, liking to go out to happy hour, enjoying some fried food at the fair if I want!!
If those bloggers live that way– and truly enjoy it– then that’s their decision but it just doesn’t seem either attainable or something I WANT to attain.
I admire/relate to your approach to food SO much. Intuitive Eating is such a great concept, and I am working to implement it in my life as well.
We should talk more about this tonight. I have a lot of things to share – and I think we could certainly relate to one another. (Can you tell I’m way excited???)
As for blogs, there are some that I have to skim over because if I read them – I feel ways in which I don’t want to feel. Guilty, not good enough, etc. I generally don’t feel those ways, so I know the blog is a “trigger” for me – or at least brings up emotions in me that I didn’t know I had.
I like reading blogs for the real people – the real struggles, victories, decisions, etc. If I sense something fake about it, I just stop reading. Simple as that.
I love your blogging. Yes, I have run into some blogs where I want to just scream and tell them to eat more! LOL
But, I love reading the “healthy” blogs. I have learned that I CAN eat and not gain weight. What a relief!
Thanks for the blog, love it!
i eat so good all day and then around 2 or 3pm when i get a little bored! watch OUT!
as for food blogs, everyone has their own issues to deal with, i just take them as they come and are happy to get new ideas for snacks, meals, exercise ideas, etc from them.
Yes!! Living up to some bloggers is a job in itself. We all have our own needs and I think I need to keep reminding myself of that. It try not to feel any pressure but it does get hard!
I save the best for last 🙂 Except cake frosting, if you see that on my plate it’s because I don’t like most frostings..
i save the best for last too 😀
Sometimes some of the blogs I read will make me feel guilty for my food choices (ie, eating to much or not healthy enough on some days). I think I’ve commented on this before – I was super relieved to see that you used the whole egg for something you made as opposed to egg-whites only. Because I love eggs and no way would I want to switch to egg-whites – but a lot of the bloggers I follow tend to only eat egg-whites, which always gives me a mini-guilt trip.
Reading healthy food blogs has helped me to eat decent, but I don’t feel any pressure, even though I do have an ED. In fact, it has helped me to find a good balance, because you girls eat healhy, you don’t starve yourselves. In fact, I am THRILLED to see that you eat a cookie or some ice cream now and then (almost daily) because it tells me that I can do that too and not get fat!
thanks for your support, without knowing it, you’re really helping me!
I used to have the same problem when I worked full time. I would restrict myself and eat really good the first half of the day until I got home and it all went downhill from there. Right now I like to have a little treat after lunch so it doesn’t feel like I’m depriving myself of sweets until the end of the day. After a satisfying dinner, I have another piece of chocolate and brush my teeth. This really helps because your mouth is clean and minty, I don’t want to eat anything else except drink water. Hope this helps!
I think what’s important is to be able to observe others and not necessarily feel pressure to do what they do, or eat what they eat. I read so many food blogs from so many different people who all have their own unique eating styles. You have to find what works for you in the end. I do see many blogs where I feel the person eats too little but never too much. Feeling guilt for either can become a horrible cycle though. You are worth more than that. I am sure you will find the balance that works for you!
Holy book! Sorry.
I used to have the same problem with being in the habit of only “allowing” myself a treat after dinner. One of my own huge triggers was being tired, so when I saved my treat for after dinner (when I’m the most tired), I was setting myself up for a binge. Now, I tend to eat something earlier if I want it. Tonight, I had ice cream before dinner. =) So now that I’ve had dinner, I’m completely stuffed and just want to digest before bedtime. No desire to eat anything else.
I have to admit that I have deleted several blogs from my reader because they are triggering. Your blog doesn’t trigger me at all. I mostly just identify with the things that you say, since I’ve had many of the same experiences, but don’t find myself triggered. For the most part, the blogs that trigger me are ones where people are completely fixated with scales and losing weight, and are under the impression that their life will improve in all areas as soon as they lose weight. I am also not good with those that follow a specific diet (WW, South Beach, etc…).
I guess the difference between being triggered “then” and being triggered “now” is that before I would’ve restricted and binged/purged more, but now I just delete them!
I think it’s totally fine to have a treat or a fried goody here and there and NOT feel guilty about it afterward! Everything’s cool in moderation, no?
I’ve started noticing that some blogs I casually read will make me question my eating and/or weight…which is something I rarely did pre-blog reading and writing. Sometimes I wonder if I should even post some of my random food creations! I’ll have a wee freak out, IM a friend, smack me back to reality and say I need a web-sitter. HA.