I get a lot of questions and a lot of searches about how I come back from overeating or a binge. This has been happening a lot since starting my new job. I’m tired, often overwhelmed and anxious. Those things equal eating for me.
Last night we got home around 11pm and I still needed to blog and finish up an article that was due at midnight. Even though we just came back from the world’s largest dinner, I ended up keeping company with a few snacks.
I want to be mad and sad and berate myself. But, instead I’m counting today as Day 1 Back to Clean Eating.
How do you bounce back from a binge?
Get some exercise.
I either walk or run to help get some of the bloat away. Overeating last night does mean my run was sucky, but at least I tried.
Tip: Laying down doesn’t count as exercise.
What do you eat after a binge?
Normal, healthy whole foods.
Even though I wasn’t very hungry after a night of overeating, I know that if I skip breakfast my stomach will start rumbling in a few hours, I’ll end up overly hungry for lunch and binge. The cycle will continue if you don’t stop it.
Do you make yourself throw up? (I get this question a lot. I hope this isn’t a message telling me my teeth are jacked up.)
No.
Ultimately, I feel crappy and pissed at myself, but that doesn’t change the situation. I have to get back on the healthy eating train and forgive myself for making a pitstop in Binge-ville.
In other, more fun news… Did you hear about Slut Walk?
No, this isn’t a joke about how I dress in Vegas…
It’s a movement that started in reaction to a cop in Toronto basically saying, “Don’t dress like a slut if you don’t want to get raped.”
WTF.
In response, a group of women and men marched on the capital in provocative clothes to protest. The movement has been growing since. 
(source)
The first Slut Walk was in Toronto, another was recently held in Seattle and now one is planned in India.
Thoughts?
Excellent write-up. I definitely appreciate this
website. Thanks!
I often end up binging on days I overeat earlier on. It’s like once I go down the eating too much path there is no stopping me. I am trying very hard to change that. My new trick is to brush teeth right after dinner, so my brain knows I am done for the night. I also tell myself that I can have whatever I want tomorrow morning (which by the time the morning rolls around the craving is long go.) I am with you all the way on green smoothies after a binge night.
The women in the Slut Walk were trying to mirror the ridiculousness of the cop’s comment….it’s suppose to be satirical. I think it’s a great idea and a great way to bring attention to the subject.
One thing I would like to point out is that “dressing provocatively” is incredibly subjective. Is showing cleavage slutty? Is wearing a tight shirt provocative? The answer is different depending on the context and the person you’re asking.
Also, as another commenter touched on earlier, rapists don’t necessarily target “slutty” women. I remember an article where rapists in prison were asked about how they chose their victims, and the most common answers had to do with wearing cloths that were easy to grab onto and get off (i.e. overalls). I think that rapists who find victims at parties or other social events are looking for someone they take advantage of, and that doesn’t really equate with wearing a low-cut top.
One more thing I want to say is that I feel like this comment thread does have an underlying theme, which is that men are more sexual than women. For example, a women dressing like a slut is OK, but inappropriate and immature. A man reacting to that with comments or physical contact is more natural because he is a man. Or is it that men are ALLOWED to be more sexual?
I personally used the term “provocatively” because I didn’t want to say they were dressed like “sluts”.
Thanks for your insightful comment 🙂
Oh, I wasn’t trying to point out a difference between “sluttly” and “provocative”. I just meant what constitutes a revealing outfit is different for different people.
I thought this was a great post. Thanks for putting it up. 🙂
This is a great post..
I have this problem a lot.
I really appreciate you coming out and saying this.. Its not always a easy thing to admit!
Wow, I find this whole conversation so interesting. Since when does equality equal stupidity? Of course women can dress as they like and no one deserves to be raped or is responsible for that act of violence but just because you can dress or act any way you want in the 21st century, doesn’t mean it’s smart to do it. Let’s use some critical thinking skills. If you dress like a “slut”, you will be treated in a sexual manner by men. Some women like being looked at like that but you “are” sending a certain message out there. Crazy, mentally unbalanced people might think you are asking for something you might not be. Looking good? Yes. Showing everything you own to everyone? Dumb and not very classy.
On another note, I have been following a number of weight loss blogs and I can’t believe how often the topic of binge comes up. I don’t really understand what that’s all about and if everyone is using the term the same way. The word makes me think of people totally out of control eating everything in sight and not being able to stop. Pretty extreme and I find it hard to believe that all these blogs by people who are trying to lose weight are by people who have a kind of problem that needs therapy? The word is thrown out there all the time. How do you define the term?
Um, sorry to be so random, but have you concidered dressing up as Jessica Rabbit for halloween?
Does that mean Ben would have to be Roger Rabbit?
Heck yes.
I love the idea of a ‘slut walk’ and I don’t think these women were just reacting to one man’s sexist comments. Every time a celebrity or athlete is accused of sexual assault there is this weird reaction that somehow the assaulted person was asking for it. Remember when Ben Roethlisberger was accused of assaulting an underage girl in a night club? And people actually said that she deserved it because 1) she was drinking and 2) was underage and shouldn’t have been there anyway. While I do think there might be certain people who target celebrities/athletes/wealthy people, I do think that we should at least not judge victims of crime.
Anywho. After I have overate (over eaten?) I like to make an effort to eat more lean protein the following day. Tofu scramble or a protein shake is a great way to start the day. I totally eat when I am tired or anxious or bored too. It’s gotten bad lately since I have a new job I am about to start and things are kind of up in the air. I’m working on it though 🙂
I think women should be allowed to wear whatever we want without getting raped! That doesn’t mean I go out wearing whatever I want–I’m not stupid. But I think it’s bullshit that I have to be so careful.
If I dress slutty, I can expect men to hit on me–but I should NEVER have to worry about them RAPING me for how I dress. That’s BS and I can’t believe that women in a healthy living community would say that rape is a logical or expected response to slutty clothing…”Men are visually stimulated”…that’s some bullshit.
Okay, “men are visually stimulated” does not equal “rape is a logical or expected response to slutty clothing…” But men DO respond to visual stimulation more-so than women. And the guy who’s willing to hit on you at work is probably going to be less inhibited when he’s had a few. No, a girl dressing “slutty” isn’t “asking for it.” But the fact of the matter is, guys are human and there’s always going to be some guy who had too much and/or feels like he’s entitled. If you’re going to go out in a micro-mini, be smart: don’t drink too much, don’t go off on your own, and try not to find yourself in some room with some guy. And for goodness sake, you and I both know we put on that little black dress to get the boys all riled up. Don’t be shocked when they do.
The korean food looked delish! I actually know where that restaurant is located. I grew up in that area in the 80s. My parents are mexican but I always had korean friends b/c uh, well our neighbors were all korean!! Okay, so fastforward many moons later, I married my high school sweetheart who happens to be KOREAN!!! LOL!! We moved outta L.A. many years ago but will often make trips to koreatown for their delish food. If you’re ever in the mood for less expensive but am-azing korean food try Hodori on the corner of Olympic and Vermont. Open 365 days a year, 24 hours! Seriously good!! Ya never know, we might run into each other!! Bulgogi WOOT WOOT!!
Is ben around during these binge episodes?
For me, binging happens when I’m home alone or my family’s gone to bed..I’m never hungry when I do it and as much as I try to talk myself out of it, it still happens. I usually start w/ a piece of fruit or something I’d consider “healthy” but from there I tend to end up jumping from ice cream to chips to chocolate, until i’ve gone completely overboard. And it always feels like I’m getting away w/ something, like I win by sneaking food that no one knows I’m eating or by making people think I eat less than I do. Its such a strange state of mind and I’m not sure how to escape it.
No, Ben is either not home, asleep or like last night – in the shower. As soon as he got out I told him about it though. It does help that he keeps an eye out for it so it’s not as easy for me to do.
The day we arrived in London there was a slut walk at Buckingham palace. That was an interesting thing to see having not slept for a day.
The Slut Walk stuff doesn’t surprise me….both the comment that spurred it and the reactions that led to a movement of sorts like this. What does surprise me is that there’s going to be one in India. Wow, I never would’ve imagined it taking up roots there. At all.
I’ve heard about the Slut Walks and I have no problem with them. You can list all the things a woman can do to “protect herself” from assault, but if she gets assaulted anyway someone will find some way to blame her instead of her assailant. Instead of telling women how they should protect themselves, we should be telling men to respect women no matter what they’re doing or how they’re dressed.
Your tips are great. I think too often people will overeat or binge and freak out. It can snowball out of control. I say this is as someone who has had to fight a history of overeating and binging myself. Thank you for your candid posting and making everyone who deals with this feel normal and hopeful.
Great tips!!!! I tend to get really mad at myself, and lose any motivation to do anything at all…not good!
After getting caught up in a cycle of bingeing once a week and then restricting, I recently started therapy for binge eating. I’m fortunate that my insurance pays for it, so I figured I might as well take advantage. I can’t seem to identify why I do it. I think part of it is burning a lot of calories through running, and not fueling properly until I’m starving and can’t resist. Another is sugar being so addicting. I seem to be much better off avoiding as much sugar as possible (even natural sugars, although bananas don’t seem to be triggering for me). At my first visit with my therapist, she seemed to be digging for some kind of emotional problem…but I’m pretty happy. My life is awesome…so why do I sabotage myself with bingeing? One idea we’re going to explore is that I’m so content that I get excited by bingeing, and feel fulfilled by it, and I may need to seek excitement in other ways, such as trying a trapeze class, for example.
My life is awesome…so why do I sabotage myself with bingeing? <- Thank you! I have went over this in my head before too! It's so frustrating when it's not an obvious emotional scar that makes us do this. I think I seek food for comfort when I feel anxious or tired, but that's hard to work on since my life is busy. I just need to deal with it in other ways.
I have mixed feelings about the cop’s comments and the “Slut Walk.”
If I remember the orginal story in context, someone in the group the cop was speaking to asked how the average person could prevent being the victim of crime. The use of “dressing like a slut” was a really inappropriate way for him to express his thought.
I think other characteristics are more likely to make you a target of stranger assault than clothing: walking alone; looking around like you are lost; being engrossed in your iPod, iPhone, etc; walking slowly and unsurely; and most of all, being intoxicated or high. Essentially, drawing attention to yourself in a way that suggests you are vulnerable.
But the truth is, every time I wear a shirt that shows cleavage (and I have plenty ‘o cleavage!) I get a lot more negative, harassing attention from men and have to be more alert to my surroundings and the people I encounter. In a perfect world, these jerks would never treat me differently based on my shirt configuration, but in the real world, some do. So you can protect yourself based on how the world works today, and you can ALSO protest the mindset that exposing body parts somehow makes you a target.
Thanks for adding this!
There was a Slut Walk in Portland a few weeks ago but I was out of town. Otherwise I would have marched!
I actually did a post about a Slutwalk I went to a couple of weeks ago. I think the name essentially misrepresents the core message, which is that rape is inexcusable no matter how the victim is dressed. I wrote about it here: http://www.almostovernow.com/2011/06/saturday-slutwalk.html
Your thoughts on bingeing always provoke such insightful responses too. Thanks a lot for sharing: I struggle a heck of a lot with bingeing through anxiety myself so it’s nice to hear others’ perspectives on the issue.
Thanks Jessica 🙂
I enjoy the company of food more than that of my friends. LOL what does that say about my friends? Hehehe.
They had a slut walk in Spokane last weekend. Except no one actually dressed like a slut, or at least the news didn’t film the slutty people. I don’t get it.
I love the idea that girls went out to support it, but didn’t feel the need to dress provocatively (if that was the case?).
people actually ask you that?! weird. was it like an out and out question or was there some type of concern since you do talk about binging? i’m hoping it was out of concern!
Hi Monica – I’m so glad you wrote this post. I binged on Monday and have been resisting the urge to binge again. Here’s my set up: I’m stressed about the sale of my house. Every time I have to work from home (which is OK w/ my boss, but not necessarily encouraged), I am stressed about not being in the office and whatever the people looking at (now buying!) our house are doing. Add to that the other stresses of daily life, I’m overwhelmed. I binged Monday and felt bad about it, but realized that I needed to forgive myself because I had neglected to honor hunger signals and my body was initially hungry. I then had to forgive the fact that I didn’t practice my other techniques for stress reduction (meditiate, pray, take a walk, etc.) That said, it’s Wednesday and I still feel crazy hungry, but have been eating healthy and a good amount. I know that the negative voices in my head are speaking loudly and saying, it’s ok to soothe yourself with food. I have to recognize that soothing myself with food actually leaves me feeling like crap and take the time to do more time-consuming things to care for myself. I have to read, write, pray, and have faith that this too shall pass. That I will make healthy decisions and nourish my body. It’s a lot of positive self talk. I just hope I believe in myself enough to keep doing what I need to do. It is so fast to shovel in food and to chew/swallow. In the end, I feel the effects with lethargy and clothes that are too tight. This morning my pants were so tight I had to change. Instead of killing myself about it, I found a pair of pants that felt comfortable. I just need to have faith that I’m worth it. THANK YOU!!!
You’re welcome 🙂 Hang in there.
Re: why do I binge when I’m a happy person topic… I think about this all of the time. I have a GREAT life. It’s insane that I’m so stressed during this phase of the house sale process b/c the darn thing sold and it’s a good situation. That said, when I was a kid I learned to cope w/ any situation by eating (or not). Hours of therapy later, I realize that I still struggle to choose the new behaviors I have learned (and really want to practice) when I have my history. My therapist also suggested that I might be wired to react w/ negative eating behaviors. She said that’s no excuse to binge or starve myself, but to accept that part of me is wired to tend toward coping with food. I don’t want to spark some huge debate b/c people get up in arms over this type of discussion, but it helps me to think “I might be wired to cope with food, but I have the knowledge/tools to make healthier decisions. I just have to tune out the ‘binge/starve’ voice and practice positive self talk. Easier said than done some days.
Hm. I think this whole slut walk deal = awesome!
In other news, have you heard about Melbourne’s F**k Walk? Also awesome:
http://mostlywater.org/thousands_say_they_will_join_fuckwalk_australia
Great to know that a cop like that is out to ‘protect and serve’. I think that kind of statement deserves a serious response like the walk.
Also, I’m kind of shocked that people ask you if you throw up!
I’m willing to answer any question, so I’m not so shocked 🙂
I thought there was one in LA? (Not a binge, I mean a walk!!)
I just wrote a post about binge-ing:
http://eatingasapathtoyoga.wordpress.com/2011/06/18/binge-proofing
Um, someone asked you if you barf? WRONG!
That cop sounds like an absolute pig. Sometimes I feel like we’re back in the 50s and 60s with the way some people think.
I can not BELIEVE that there are still people that believe what a woman is wearing means she “deserves” to be attacked in some way. That absolutely disgusts me beyond belief.
Oh, I love the idea of a “slut walk” as a response!
🙂
Oh my, how sad. The man’s statements were stupid, no doubt about it, but the response was even dumber. Here is a group of women who have not thought through their actions. A slut walk? Really? This is what we have aspired to be? Sluts? And we let one man’s ridiculous comments spurn us to these new depths? The whole thing makes me sad for women. For me as a woman, I am not remotely interested in attending something so demeaning and stupid. I am a strong, proud woman and I don’t need to prove myself to this man in this way. How sad for the ones that do.
Good points!
I’ve actually heard of this and I love Amy’s comment. Yeah; the comment was stupid… but so was the response. And let’s be honest, a) men are visually motivated (the normal ones and the sociopaths), b) a LOT of women have a nasty habit of being in the wrong place at the wrong time after drinking a lot of alcohol, and c) the reason we choose our clothes and don’t all just wear a uniform is because what you wear says something about who you are. Whether or not it says you’re “asking for it” or not is up for debate, but it DOES say something… or you would have picked something else.
I totally disagree with the comments above. I come from a culture and country (Indian) where it’s considered NORMAL for guys to stare, touch and comment on you no matter what you are wearing. The fear of society and shame has made women silent on sexual abuse and it seems around the wolrd it’s the same story.
To make another point clearer – rape isn’t about sex – it’s about POWER. The culture of victim-blaming, of saying and thinking “oh she asked for it” or “what did she expect dressed like that?” is EXACTLY why SlutWalk is such a necessary thing.
Tell me then, why do children get raped? Old women? Women in burkhas? Were they ‘asking for it’ too?
Just recently I read an article about an 11-year-old girl who was gang-raped by teenagers and the community pretty much said that exactly (http://www.alternet.org/newsandviews/article/513829/11-year-old_girl_horrifically_gang-raped%3B_new_york_times_article_blames_the_victim/). Seriously??!
Secondly, the word “slut” itself. As defined, its a woman who has multiple sexual partners. As others would argue, perhaps a woman with the morals of a man? Take your pick.
The message of the protest was clear. Stop blaming the victims. No one asks to be raped. Stop focusing on what a woman was wearing because it doesn’t matter what she wears, the motivation of crimes against women don’t lie in our clothes. Stop looking there!
And yet, one of the first reactions is discomfort with the word slut. Why use that word for the protest?
That is exactly why it is a good thing. Reclaiming the word. Repeating again and again “STOP BLAMING THE VICTIM AND HER CLOTHES”. It is as simple and as basic as that.
Sorry Monica, to hog your comment section but it’s an issue I strongly believe in and am completely flabbergasted that people still think like that!
Hmm interesting on the slut walk thing. While I in no way agree with what that cop said, I do think women should be congnizant of what their outfit says about them or might allude to. No, I’m not saying a skimpy outfit means you’re asking to get raped or anything but skimpy outfits do have certain connotations associated with them.
Of course, everyone has the right to wear whatever they want, but I think my choosing certain outfits you’re exposing yourself to a higher risk.
How do you differentiate overeating from a binge yourself?
I overate at the restaurant. I binged when I got back home. It’s normal (on some level) for people to overeat on special occasions or with super delicious food. It’s not normal to be full and stuff yourself further in a mindless manner. A lot of the difference is in how I feel when I’m actually doing it – and being unable to stop.