Hello!! How’s it going? I’m pretty excited to start a new week and get crazy with my “to do” list. I definitely enjoyed the weekend and was not productive at all. Super random, but my gym doesn’t have early morning classes on Monday. So while I wanted to hit up the gym for a class I did a short run with a few intervals. I’m hoping to get in some strength in a little bit too.
Post-run I made breakfast and ate PB out of the jar. Hey, no one else eats it so it’s totally okay. That is science.
This weekend Shape Magazine sent Vegas a super cool box for him to sleep in, he loves it!
Okay, now let’s address a huge life decision – how to know when you should have kids. This is a tough one and I’ve heard several people say, “You’ll never be 100% ready, you just gotta go for it.” One of my friends even told me you should start trying to make a baby when you’re like 70 or 80% ready, because that’s as good as it gets. Noted.
But I feel like the best way to tell if you’re ready to have a baby is
A.) you want to and have someone you love that is responsible and loving and you want to have in your life for the next 20+ years that also wants this
or B.) all your friends have babies and you’re left out and they don’t hang out with you anymore because instead of going to happy hour they’re going to the park and on play dates and all they talk about are their babies and they eat goldfish and juice instead of wine and cheese and so basically you’ve lost your friends and the only way to get them back is to have a baby.
When the time comes, All Day Parenting resources can be immensely helpful in providing articles and practical solutions for the journey ahead, helping you navigate the complexities of parenthood with confidence and support. Parenthood, with all its challenges, becomes a rewarding journey with these resources by your side, guiding you through the everyday triumphs and tribulations. Remember, the decision to become a parent should stem from a place of genuine desire and readiness, and with the right support, you can embark on this transformative adventure with confidence and grace.
I’ll work on that later because today I was busy hanging out at a pumpkin patch with my cool mom friends and their babies. Irvine Regional Park has a very cute pumpkin patch with rides and activities for kids.
I was the creeper without a baby at the maze. Next time I’m going to borrow my niece.
On the way home I chomped on a pear and hit up a few stores for almond milk and other random stuff.
Kids are awesome and also super hard. I think it’s important to have stability with your partner, but finances and jobs and things are more flexible. And I personally never felt 100% ready but it was just felt like a good time to start. Good luck with your journey if this is something you’re considering!
It is great to have some one love you unconditionally the way your child does.
My husband and I tease all the time about how “good we had it” back before kids. But truthfully, they own our hearts and we could never imagine life without them. Think of the love you have for your teeny person niece and multiply that by a BILLION. You see a bit of yourself and your family carried on into the world; and I’m not just talking looks.
Which part of it scares you (or has you hesitating)? I feel like if you’re even entertaining the idea, then your heart is open to it and it’s probably a good time. You will NOT EVER regret it. You’ve done some wonderful stuff and seen amazing places. None of that has to stop, they’ll just be less of it and that’ll be ok because you will have this human being that God created and gave to you that you happen to adore. And nothing says if you have one you have to have two or three or five; just have one and take it from there.
I can say this mushy stuff as the parent of TWO teenagers. One happens to be a 14 year old stinky 8th grader that drives me out of my EVER-LOVING mind about 230947832049 times a day! I still look at him and think “dammit I love you so much, kid; stop pissing me off”.
And mini-Shannon (aka Rebecca) has her moments but really is a dream of a daughter. The firstborns usually are, that’s why I say “go ahead and just have one”.
Jump in the pool, Monican…join the party!
Wishing you and Ben all the best; and many blessings, too! 🙂
I knew I wanted kids eventually, but when I got pregnant a few months after getting married, I was like, okay, I guess this is it. Bahaha, I hadn’t even held a baby since I was 6. I did have a mini melt down when I found out that lasted like 10 minutes, but my husband was really good about it. Now I’m like, okay, let’s have like, a billion kids.
I don’t actually want to have my own kids but I started dating a guy who has a kid and doesn’t really want anymore so it just seems like the perfect match… 😉
I’m definitely in the A and the B category! haha I want kids but I’m also the only one out of all my friends who doesn’t have kids yet. I think it’s important to live life though and enjoy the little things. I love your blog btw! I’m a new follower!
1?? I don’t even know lol. I’m still firmly in the camp of no kids even though all my friend are but I’m over here like “I’m going to London and Paris next year” and they’re all like “my kid has a college fund” …I like my priorities 🙂
Considering my last post was about Astroglide TTC, my mind is pretty made up that we want kids. But it is not as easy as those stern discussions from high school teachers told us it would be.
I was the one who would never get married so kids never entered the equation until I hit my 30’s. We love the freedom of “child-free” and will continue to do so
1 lol. There’s no way I’m ever going to want to have a kid…even though I’ve lost all my friends to parenthood. I love my life too much the way it is.
I wasn’t sure for a really long time, and then when I decided that the timing was at least sort of right it took us over a year to conceive. So you never know! I don’t think I’m one of those types of people that was born to be a mom, and it’s taken a lot of adjusting in so many way, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. And if I can say that after being up several times last night with a teething toddler (the same one that has also gotten upset eighteen times in thirty minutes because he keeps breaking his Duplo tower) then you know it’s legit.
definitely NO babies for me hahah. I also love when people say, oh you’ll change your mind when you’re older… yeah, because at 30 NOW i’ll want them, after 30 years of not wanting them heheh
I think this generation of baby makers has it made…in the sense that typically you get married when you think you’re ready to start a family, so that’s half the battle. When I got married, all of our friends got married and then we all spent time as married people getting ready to have a family. Truth? When you and the one you love decide it’s time, go for it. You are never really married. Losing friends or hanging out with friends who have babies and you don’t…that shouldn’t weigh too much on the decision making. Our friends had babies before we did and I was the best “Auntie” I could be. I babysat so the moms and dads could have a night out. I loved it. We decided to go for it when our finances balanced out a little on the positive side.
I mean, you are never really ready!!! Ha!
Haha! The baby issue is something I just talked about on my blog. I would love to have kids but not everyone is so fortunate. It took me awhile to realize I wanted them and then when I did, I was told I had a .1% chance of natural conception. Infertility sucks royally.
Ugh, all my friends are having kids and it totally sucks. Hence why I am contemplating moving to a big city where I can hang out with single people:)
I definitely want to have kids but man… timing is everything! There’s so many doors that are opening in my life and certain things I’d love to do before kids… but I really want to have kids young so I can A) bounce back faster and B) have youthful “energy” that might not be as strong if I waited an extra 5 or so years. I do think it’s important (as long as you’re ready enough) to have kids when your friends do so you can go through the same phase of life together as well as have kids that can be best friends just like you are 🙂
I don’t have kids yet so not too much of an expert, BUT I really don’t think it is something you can ever truly be ready for!
I’ve had this same thought. Not the ‘ready to have a baby’ thought, but the ‘i’ll have to have a baby to have friends again’ thought. I’m not out boozing, but it’s as if my house is home to the black plague and no one comes near it anymore. They all want to stay at their house, or go to other mommy houses and they didn’t invite me because the figured I wouldn’t want to go.
I like pudding! I like cookies! I like juice boxes! …I like to color!
That patch looks great! I’m gonna have to check it out, thanks!
Don’t stress about “readiness.” The only question you need to ask yourself is, do you (YOU. Not you-as-part-of-a-couple) want kids? Like really, truly want to be a mom? Or not?
If you do, and the time is reasonably right (meaning, you have support and a stable income and access to prenatal care) then go for it and don’t stress too much about the timing. Things WILL work out, and as long as you wanted motherhood, you’ll never regret it. Your marriage may crumble, your career may stall, you’ll lose friends and gain new ones, but you’ll never regret being somebody’s mama 🙂
My ship has sailed. But luckily I never had the question in my mind. I was widowed young and went kidless.
And now I’m dating someone with kids and they are great! I wish I got to spend more time with them than I do. But they are Tweens so a lot easier. I’m just not good with babies 🙂
The answer is definitely B! You should have one when all your friends do. It’s no fun being left out, or only being able to talk to the babies because you don’t have anything to talk about with your friends anymore! All my friends have babies and it’s on fun anymore!