I have always kept up on yearly physical check-ups. I don’t know if this is normal or what but it’s just been part of my life. Even after my mom stopped taking me to the doctor in high school I made my own appointment each year in college (and since). I liked my doctor and it was never a really big deal to go, do the thing and that’s it.
So it was a shock when l got a call after my annual physical a few years ago that my pap smear came back with abnormal results. A nurse called me and said my doctor wanted me to come in to talk about it and I should make an appointment.
Um, you shouldn’t just call someone and say, “Hey, you are dying of a horrible disease so just give up, eat ice cream for dinner and come see us in a week so we can explain your options.”
Okay. Maybe I’m forgetting exactly what the nurse said but that’s what I heard.
Luckily I am super dramatic so I managed to convince the nurse that I was having a nervous breakdown and needed the doctor to just call me and tell me what was wrong. They wanted me to come in the following week and I could NOT wait that long. I had never had any health issues before so this was really scary. The doctor called me back an hour later to tell me – I have HPV.
(Side note: I got the HPV vaccine but might have contracted it before the series of shots was complete. Or it could be a different strain. Boo. You should still look into it if you are eligible or have kids eligible for the vaccine. I don’t want you to have to go through what I am going through now.)
My doc talked me down from the ledge (by ‘ledge’ I mean selling all my stuff and spending my last few days on a beach in Fiji) and we set up and appointment for the following week.
“HPV is so common that nearly all sexually active men and women get it at some point in their lives. But most people who have HPV don’t know it.
Most HPV infections have no harmful effect at all. Some types of HPV may cause genital warts. These are called low-risk types of HPV. Some types of HPV may cause cell changes that sometimes lead to cervical cancer and certain other genital and throat cancers. These are called high-risk types.” Source: planned parenthood
Transgender people are also at risk of getting infected with this disease so they should have access to adequate trans healthcare services to help them get the protection or treatment they need.
At my appointment the next week I had a quick cryo-therapy procedure and my doctor froze the ‘bad’ cells out. Since then I’ve had healthy, normal check-ups. Boom.
Except last month after my routine check-up my doctor called me and said there are abnormal cells again. I have LSIL cells which means some cells are abnormal and might go away on their own. But I have to have a colposcopy to find out what type of cells we’re working with. I have an appointment to do that next week. I won’t know for another week or two after that what level the cells are right now. (She explained it to me kind of like there were levels of abnormal cells – okay / bad / really bad.) And once we know we can figure out step 2.
Why am I telling you all of this?
Yes, this is awkward and embarrassing – but that’s mainly if you don’t know much about HPV. It is very common and most sexually active people will get it at some point (several sites estimate approximately 75-80% of sexually active women will get HPV at some point). Most don’t know they have it because there are often no symptoms. (There are no screening tests to see if men are carriers at this point.)
I don’t have any symptoms. I would have never known if I didn’t go to the doctor. So partially I want to give you a head’s up that just because everything seems ‘fine’ with your body it might not be so just get a yearly check-up to know.
And I wanted to share this because when I found out I was super scared and nervous and embarrassed and overwhelmed.
Then, I mentioned it to a friend who told me ‘Yeah, my friend Liz had that too…she had that thing done where…”
I told someone else that said, “I had that in college! I just remember I had to have a procedure and it sucked but I was fine the next day. And Jen had it too…”
Every time I mention it to someone they share that they had a similar issue or know someone who did. It is common – but no one talks about it. So I’m sharing this because I consider myself (somewhat) normal and healthy and smart about ‘bedroom safety’ but it happens to all kinds of people. Take care of yourself.
For more info:
Abnormal Cervical Cancer Screening info via ACOG <- best breakdown of different test results and next steps
HPV info for Men via CDC
My World of HPV a personal account via Pysch Central
Pap and HPV FAQs via Women to Women
Marie says
Thanks for sharing! HPV is so common and they don’t even test guys at this point. I have it and had to do coloposies, but was fine. Thanks for sharing about what they do if there are bad cells found.
V says
This is one of the reasons I find the protocol for not having yearly Pap smears unsettling. The last exam I had was in 2014. I’ve asked/ tried to schedule an appointment for the last 2 years and keep getting told I don’t need another one yet. I’ve never had abnormal results, and I have been with the same person for almost 5 years, but I still want that peace of mind.
JC says
I love love LOVE you for sharing this!!! HPV is SO common and yet has such a stigma attached to it. Thank you for spreading awareness (and making those of us who have had to deal with the dreaded abnormal pap, feel normal!)
Denise says
Thank you for sharing…. I have to go in for a colposcopy on Tuesday. I’m almost 45, 3 kids, and never had an abnormal exam until now and have HPV. I was like wth? I am reading on your comments that colposcopy’s are not fun … why didn’t the nurse tell me that? She acted like it was no big deal and I will be in and out. Was she thinking since I’ve had 3 kids I can handle this??? Now I’m worried.
Saeriu says
I’ve read the vaccine actually increases your chance of getting HPV and also some cancers and increases chance of infertility. Not a good thing. Whether or not it’s true…it’s too much of a risk for me.
Laura F says
Been there, done that. Abnormal pap, colposcopy, another abnormal pap, another colposcopy, and eventually a normal pap and a huge sigh of relief from me. It was never a big deal but having to go to the gyno more often than usual was no fun. It took a few years to work itself out but now I’m all good. Find a doctor you like and take care of yourself, ladies!
Christine says
I had an abnormal pap four years ago, got a colposcopy, and my last three paps have been normal. I was completely terrified that I was dying of uterine cancer when I heard “abnormal cells” and “HPV” and didn’t tell ANYONE except my boyfriend (now husband.) I wish I had known more about the subject before it happened. Super kudos to you for getting information to the/your public!
Sara says
Thank you for sharing this. I went through this last year and was devastated – even though I’d educated myself. I even had the guy I was dating at the time break up with me when I told him. 🙁 the more we share this stuff and support each other, hopefully the less alone we will feel!
Ashley says
In 2009 I had an abnormal pap & they said I had HPV. I had a colposcopy & biopsy but everything was fine. I had the vaccine prior to that as well. I e had normal paps ever since.
Crystal says
This is my day to day! I work the women’s health care company that makes the ThinPrep Pap test and the APTIMA HPV test! Get you pap ladies! Removing the stigma is key. HPV is so common and knowing you have an infection allows your doctor to follow you more closely. Also get a genotype, types 16 and 18 are the most virulent and type 45 can be an indicator for adenocarcinoma.
Melanie says
I had an abnormal Pap smear, then a colpo. They found out I had the bad cells. I had a LEEP done to get rid of the bad cells (it wasn’t fun, I had to wear a pad for a while). I was very scared, but two normal Pap smears later and all has been good. It is very common, and scary, but I’m sure it will all be okay. Yay for check ups
Ash says
I wasn’t alive in the 80s, but I do know that during that time, AIDS was made out to be this terrible all-consuming monster that you could get from drinking from the same water fountain as someone with it. It basically caused mass hysteria and alienated a lot of people with the disease. (PLEASE NOTE: I am NOT drawing a comparison, at all, to HPV and HIV/AIDs) – but simply highlighting that it should come as no surprise, especially in America, that our Sex Ed is more than lackluster and everyone is too afraid to talk about ANYTHING related to sexual health. I really admire you using your platform in this way – to connect, relate, and educate – on something that is personal for you and your family. I hope these days fly by and you get your answers soon. Wishing you the best of health and happiness.
Lisa N. says
Hi there! I’ve had HPV (high risk) for about 10 years. I’ve had a series of bad paps and about 5 colpos. They are no fun but thankfully, everything has turned out fine so far. I wish the best for you. It is great that you stay on top of your health and get regular paps. You are doing everything right. I know how stressful it is and I’m sorry you have to go through it. You’re not alone. It is very common. I am super happy that you shared this post. No time for shame or stigma!!
Sending positive thoughts your way.
Nicole says
Thanks for sharing! This does not get talked about enough. I have had two colposcopies (truth: they’re not fun, but 2 Advil beforehand makes a WORLD of difference). Honestly, though, peace of mind matters way more than 5 min of discomfort. All will be ok! The great thing about cervical cancer is it takes FOREVER to grow, so these regular check-ups are our saving grace! Good luck – it’s quick and will be over before you know it 🙂
Megan @ Lazy Runner Girl says
Thanks so much for sharing. I will be sending some positive energy your way and hope all is well.
LR says
Odds are the vaccine won’t protect you (or anybody else). The vaccine supposedly targets 4 strains out of hundreds.
Also, it isn’t necessary to take such aggressive action such as a colposcopy or LEEP after an abnormal pap smear; most of the time if you just leave it alone your next PAP will be normal again.
I believe the current guideline is a PAP every 2-3 years now.
http://ausfp.com/unusual-brand-new-treatment-abnormal-pap-smears/
Andrea says
Love your blog as always, but love it even more now that you shared this. I also have HPV and it’s true, nobody talks about it! And so many people have it. Thanks for being so honest and open!
Sally @ sweat out the small stuff says
I go annually too. As a matter of fact today I’ll be calling for my appointment. I always go in my birthday month. A mammo and a pap are my birthday present to myself 🙂
jen says
thanks for publishing this! in the girls episode where one of them has hpv (hannah i think, i obviously wasn’t into that show), jessa says “oh – all adventurous women do.” SO MANY PEOPLE have it or have had it. i had it 6 years ago (apparently it can just work its way out of your system after a while) and had to get the colposcopy procedure – which is uncomfortable but no big deal, and now everything is totally fine. 🙂
MaryLynne says
You are awesome to share your story in an effort to help your readers.
Sending positive thoughts your way. I had a colposcopy 13 years ago and normal paps since.
Susy says
Thank you for bringing awareness to this matter. It’s not often talked about and definitely needs to be. I get my yearly pap smear in the spring time and got it back in April. I hope your results are good ones.
Angela @ GardenVarietyRunner says
I just had a papsmear in May, but I wanted to comment to thank you for writing this. HPV is not something I have dealt with, but I have dear friends that have suffered through different STIs and I agree that it is so so important to see a doctor regularly! I hope that you have the “okay” cells and not bad or really bad. Sending positive vibes!