Confession: I’ll always think of myself as fat… but that’s okay…
[ From @RunEatRepeat on Instagram ]
It’s very on-trend right now to post unflattering pictures of yourself… So I’m just posting this so that someone can tell me I’m brave.
Ha!! (I’m joking)
The reality is I was a chubby kid, overweight teen and struggled with binge eating and diets all through college.
I avoided going out.
I was self conscious ALL THE TIME.
I hated my reflection in the mirror.
The scale always made me feel like shlt.
I don’t know if it’s because I was ‘big’ during my formative years or what, but …
I think I will always identify as fat.
I’m okay with that because I don’t think of it as a negative thing… it’s just another adjective to describe me.
As long as I’m happy and healthy- it’s not a big deal if I identify myself as big, small, dark, light, loud, quiet, funny, hairy, funny, interesting, fast, slow or whatever… it’s not hurting anyone.
(I should note – it’s not hurting me as long as I don’t use the word ‘fat’ or any word to make myself feel bad. It doesn’t matter if you tell yourself you’re fat or skinny or dumb or smart – as long as those words don’t hold power over you and control your self esteem or how you feel about your physical appearance.)
That said, no matter how much I weigh –
I try to stand up straight, suck it in and know my good side for pictures.
I don’t have photoshop but I use filters.
I have really big eyes and look like a cartoon character in real life.
I might look about 10 pounds heavier in person.
I’m just sharing this so that you won’t be surprised if we meet in person or ever compare yourself to me. I never want anyone to compare themselves to me and I really don’t want you to compare yourself to me and feel bad. I’m just a normal weirdo who spends a lot of time on social media and not a measuring stick to hold up against yourself.
And I don’t care what kind of pictures you post of yourself but in case you’re struggling I want to remind you that…
It’s totally cool if you want to stand up straight and suck it in or wear a lot of makeup or show your muffin top or your booty or your pimples …
Do whatever you feel comfortable with and don’t feel pressured to be anyone but yourself.
You don’t owe anything to anyone (except to be nice to your mom).
I just really hope you love and appreciate your body and abilities and use them to do good.
xoxo.
Monica
Hi! I’m Jenna and i always read this Blog! I think that you are so inspirational to me.
So i have decided to share with this amazing community my new way of life and the tool that i had used to get it.
This is a new way of life and thanks to this and, of course, of this blog, i can enjoy my life, REALLY!
xoxo
Yup. I weigh 117 and am 5’7″ but will always think of myself as chubby because I wa 50 lbs heavier in high school. Those were my formative years so, it is what it is!
I really love this. I feel this way about myself and also with my pace as a runner. When I started I was slower….10:00 miles and I’ve always seen myself as that even after dozens of sub 2:00 half marathons and several sub 4:20 marathons. I still say if I’m going to run 6 miles I’ll be an hour, etc. I also never have seen myself as “small”, always the bigger gal but I’ve learned what living fit and free is for me and can appreciate my body and abilities. What a great post today.
I’m glad you posted this, Monica! I love your positive spin on the thought! 🙂
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
I’ve struggled a lot with this in the past but being currently pregnant is helping a lot in the loving my body department!