Every time I do something embarrassing I think, “I should post this for confession Thursday and get it off my chest.” But it happens so often that I forget most of the things I do. I am the worst. I think it feels liberating to just admit to something dumb and move on, ya know?
Last week I found myself in a very awkward situation at a place that I think might have been a cult. Seriously. Well, that’s a story for my book (if I ever write one).
Today we’re talking about something else, my dirty lil secret of this week…
This morning I ran and ate and then hit the shower. I don’t wash my hair everyday. There are strict rules against that, right? The hair gurus say you’re not supposed to wash everyday, it’s science or fashion or something.
I don’t even use dry shampoo that often. I’m just like, “it is what it is…” and work with it.
But this morning I decided to wash my hair because I had curled it the other day and at this point it was a little sad. I was going through the motions of showering and grabbed the shampoo to wash my hair…
that’s when I realized something weird
No, it wasn’t a spider.
No, my phone wasn’t ringing.
No, it wasn’t a murderer looming outside the shower – it was worse.
Any guesses?
I WAS USING DOG SHAMPOO.
Yes, dog shampoo. I think I bought it when Roxy was staying with me a few weeks ago. I ended up taking her to the groomers and not washing her. I threw the shampoo under the bathroom sink and went on with life.
I guess the other day when I ran out of my usual shampoo I grabbed that one thinking it was something I picked up at Marshall’s at some point. I have probably used it once before. The price tag is directly over the dog on the front and there is nothing that says DOG SHAMPOO on it. I guess a few days in the shower was starting to make the tag transparent and the dog started peeking through. I spotted it today when I went to wash my hair and stopped immediately to question my sanity.
Is this really my life? Am I really using dog shampoo right now? Have I completely lost my shit?
Yes. Yes. and Yes.
No wonder I keep wanting to hump people’s legs… it all makes sense now.
Oh. My. God. This is amazing. Seriously made me lol– and also be surprised that I’ve never done that myself. The sticker covering the dog head is too funny!!
LOL
Yes but is your “coat” glistening?? Maybe you’ve discovered a secret!
Ok, that was hysterical. Thank you for the laugh!! I guess it smelled pretty good if you didn’t notice, right? 😉
I’ve never been able to get away without washing my hair every day, unless I’m not working out. So sometimes on the weekend, I will not wash my hair for one day. But if I work out, run, or play a sport, my hair is sweaty and gross and needs to be washed.
I once drunkenly thought that a blue face cleanser/toner was mouthwash in my friend’s bathroom! I was like, “Too drunk, gotta freshen my breath” and grabbed it and used it as mouthwash.
Ha! I feel like this is something I would do…
I grabbed a baby wipe in the car one day and thought that’s funny afterwards….it was a leather wipe for my car…guess by face won’t be cracking 🙂
you are AWESOME. it is obvious from the posts above everyone enjoys reading your blog and your funny antics! keep them coming.
Thank you 🙂
I haven’t laughed that hard in a while! Thanks for sharing.
hahaha!! Did you like the way it made your hair feel? Is this why you ate raw chicken?! hahahaha this is so hilarious.
Hi!
I’ve been reading your blog for a short while and I love it, so fresh and funny, and inspiring for a wannabe marathon runner (me). I had to say hi today because this post made me lol!
I. Am. Dying! Thanks for the laugh! “Antiseptic shampoo for a cleaner and healthier COAT.” This would totally be something I would do if I had a dog. I’m glad there is some out there I can totally relate to!
My grandma brushed her teeth with my dad’s hair gel once. Oh and my other grandma ate a dish of butter once thinking it was mashed potatoes. 🙂
Laughed. Out. Loud. You’re a hoot!
This is why we should be friends!!!
This is awesome!! Did it make your hair soft and shiny? Remember the horse shampoo? I am guilty of using that so my hair would grow. LOL
I’ve done something similar: grabbing the wrong thing. Also, I’m worried one day I’ll accidentally put one of my dog’s treat in my mouth.
I remember in the 90s when horse shampoo/conditioner was the rage. They still sell Mane ‘n’ Tail in the human aisle.